Refocus

Okay, so you're in a rut. You're feeling hopeless and depression is beginning to set in. You've made a mistake.

What's next? Do you wallow in self-pity or get back up and start over?

"But what I did was so bad, so extreme, so sinful", is what you exclaim. Okay and?! Does it give you a right to self-loathe and keep re-living the past? Do you know that you're giving it more power by doing that?

Remember this… stop, breathe and refocus. It's time to re-strategize. Recall those goals you once set out to do before you stumbled; yeah the ones that's going to make you successful. Use the energy you're wasting in guilt and power your dreams.

Oh, and those feelings and emotions you felt before the fall, including the ones that may have led you into doing what you now regret, feel them, but this time, in the decision making process, choose to go the other route!

We all mess up whether intentionally or not but it shouldn't kill your dreams and your drive. One bad decision doesn't determine your character. Remember…. Refocus! 😘

I’m feeling…. (Intimacy)

What do you do when the feeling of wanting to belong, wanting to feel loved or simply cuddle with someone, but you’ve made the decision to not date and also to practice celebacy? 

These feelings are real and in making the decision to be celebate, we often overlook these feelings or we think we would be able to mask or control them. 

Our nature craves companionship and intimacy, it’s a natural feeling. I’m not talking about sexual relations but intimacy in a sense of ‘belonging’. 

Sometimes as a human being, you crave the companship of the opposite sex. You want more than just your friends coaching you along the journey. You want someone to tell you just how beautiful you are, how sincere, intriguing and motivating you are, and you want them to mean it. It’s something about hearing those things from someone other than your family or close friends that seems to hit a soft spot inside you. 

So what do you do when you’re feeling ‘some type of way’? … One, you accept the way you feel. Don’t try to mask those feelings by saying, “I shouldn’t feel this way” or experience guilt for feeling such a way; instead own your feelings and learn your trigger points. Learn what drives those emotions and how you can deal with them. 

Second, you should know it’s okay to be in the company of the opposite sex but you must be strong enough to not comprise yourself. Having accountability partners are crucial and you should know before hand, the person whose company you’re going to be in. Be honest about your goals and celibacy and your expectations for wanting to meet with them. 

Isolation can be unhealthy. It’s also not natural. Our creator made us for relationships (friendship, marriages, families). 

It’s okay to feel, it’s okay to socialize, it’s okay to date! You must set standards and boundaries, as these would help you stick to your goals while being a social butterfly. 

My Chemical Peel

Recently I got a Chemical Peel to remove dead skin cells and to rejuvenate new ones as part of the process for treating acne scarring and blemishes. I was excited as anyone would be because I finally found a remedy to clear my skin and not only that, it was going to be done by someone I totally trusted to care for my skin.

 I showed up for my appointment happy but nervous as well. The nerves began telling on me when I started to think about the process. Just prior to my appointment, I went online and did what I call ‘research’. I viewed testimonials of clients who spoke about the shedding, swelling and plush red faces which begins days after the Peel. I even saw a video of a Peel ‘gone wrong’. As a result, I began to change my mind on  wanting to have the procedure done. Then I asked myself, “Have you forgotten the reason why you’re getting this Peel?” And with that one nugget, I immediately found enough motivation to continue the process. 

Life can be a similar to a getting Chemical Peel. We start off wanting something so bad like fulfilling a dream or pursuing life’s purpose but when we look at the ‘when, how, why, what, and who’ we become tense and afraid; some people even abort the mission entirely.

We have to understand that every process isn’t going to be peachy. And like the Chemical Peel, the shedding away of the old to bring afresh the new, has to occur in order for good success. We should always keep in the mind the reason why we’re doing what we’re doing. And like my trusted esthetictician, if you believe in God the way maker, you can rest your trust in Him and be comforted. He will bring you to your destination. 

When God is for you…

Have you ever hit rock bottom and gave up on almost everything or perhaps everything?! Have you ever waited to hear the voice of God only to feel like He’s not answering your prayers or that He’s neglecting you?

I know most of us have experienced this feeling. It usually happens when we’re in our testing phase. God often goes silent on us. Remember the Bible story of Job, who was afflicted in every area of his life to the point where he wanted to die. He cried out continuously to God but it seemed as though God wasn’t there. But let me tell you how God indeed was. He was there witnessing on Job’s behalf when the devil himself tried to bring claim against Job and even in doing so God was preparing the ‘turn around’ in Job’s life. 

Right now I’m in that seem pit. Where almost everything in my life feels afflicted and I so desperately want it to end. Everything thing in the physical tells me to give up but my spirit will not allow it. And although it seems God has gone silent on me, my prayers are still being answered in the most subtle ways. So much so that my worries about tomorrow have decreased. I’ve learned to depend on God for just today. I cannot see what He has in store for me, but every prophecy, every trial and every test points to the fact that He is in the midst preparing me for my turn around. 

My faith may not be much right now but it’s enough to hold on to the promises of an unwavering God. He hasn’t change since the story Job and I doubt He will while my story is still being written. When God is for you, you’re tested so He knows you are for Him too! 

Blessings!

Letting Go and Letting God…

100 Days of Singleness Challenge by Shakeisha Mckenzie
Day 27- Aug 19

Stop making a big deal out of little things
Challenge: Let God show you the amazing things he has in store for you outside of your comfort zone.

This is one area I struggle with: being in my comfort zone, afraid of change, afraid of the unknown. What does this profits me? Nothing I suppose. There’s no challenges to conquer, no new discoveries, no acceptance of God’s best for me, simply because I have difficulties accepting change. With me, I like to ‘think’ that I’m always in ctontrol. This means I have to plan ahead and constantly be abreast of what’s happening. Any sudden changes can uproot my life and I drastically spas out for a brief moment until I can calm myself and begin to plan again. So there it is! My guilty plea. I’m afraid of stepping into the unknown, well I used to be! I just began my first step in order to change, I admitted I have a problem. My next step is finding a solution then acting on it….

AnOMinn’s Life’s Journeys

Turning Hurts into Pleasures!

With my  new holistic approach to life, I ventured out to the gym. My reasoning was to find a new hobby and as a way to rid myself of negative energy. The positive side to working out I found out to be was not only doing something with my time but the changes that occurred in my body and the happy feeling after a good workout session. So while working out for me started as a means to rid myself of stress, it’s now a new found love for me and the benefits is a better mental state and a fit body! My trainer persauded me to try a fitness competition, so my journey to my first ever bikini competition started five days ago. I’m ten weeks out and looking forward to the challenge and the fun.

My Journey of 100 Days of being Single

100 Days of Singleness Challenge by Shakeisha McKenzie

Day 23- Aug 15

Leave your heart alone!
Challenge: leave your heart alone! Let God finish what he’s doing.

It’s good days, better days and then days when it’s all out war !! Some days Im ok with being alone, some days I WANT to be alone and then there are those days I long for companionship. It was a few days ago when I saw someone that peak my interest, not from conversation or knowing that person but just mere physical attraction and the fact that he had a job (boarder patrol officer) was even more reason to be interested. I’ve finally met someone that spark some sort of butterflies in me. But unfortunately and thank God I didn’t have nerves to act on it. I literally began that thing most women do when they meet someone, plan our lives together. It was so funny because I barely knew that person, couldn’t even remember his name! Flash forward to today and reading this post/challenge and carefully thinking, I realized I was just being impatient and caught up. I’ll wait on God’s best. I know I’m not fully where I want to be in order to have a great relationship… (Flashback) but boy was he fine!!!! Boarder Patrol 😍😂😁

My very first post of something that’s very taboo for me but yet I’ve always been led to do it. Blogging? What is it and why am I here? Firstly I’m at a point in my life where it’s either I change and be great or continue in the same pattern and be doomed for the rest of my life. You know the point in life where nothing seems to be going right no matter what you try? Yup, that’s where I’m at and I’ve relinquished total control to God and the universe. I started off journaling my moods, experiences, wellness challenges etc. and was lead to Blogging. Writing is therapeutic for me. My intentions is to heal, change and hopefully inspire! Welcome to my blog and my first post! Another life goal achieved!